So my son Alex graduated from Weber State University on Friday, and congratulations to him, but this post isn’t about that.
But every time I have an occasion to read a list of random names here in Utah — a choir concert, an honor roll, or in this case the midwinter graduating class at Weber — I have to look for those Utah names. You know, those Utah names. For reasons known only to the Almighty Himself, Utah Mormons have a propensity for saddling their children with names that are not only nontraditional, but completely made up.
So yes, I went through the entire list of graduates and, discounting the names that are unusual but are obviously part of a discrete ethnic tradition (such as the East Asian or Middle Eastern names in evidence), pulled out the following names. They fall into two distinct categories: 1) “creative” misspellings of names with actual histories and meanings, and 2) utterly fanciful concoctions of vaguely euphonious sounds that would be right at home in indie-published fantasy epic novels.
- Abbigale
- Aisha
- Akeila
- Alee Cymah
- Alexxis
- Alyx
- Amberly
- Ambria
- Ame-Leigh
- Amira
- AnnDreya
- Antonya
- Baillie
- Balie
- Braken
- Braquel
- Breanah
- BreAnna
- Breelynn
- Breeyn
- Brinlee
- Bryton
- Camree
- Caray
- Chansi
- Chealsi
- Cinzia
- Coty
- Cristyn
- Cyler
- Daisha
- Daxon
- Dayna
- Deloni
- Etazhanae
- Ewelina
- Gregery
- Hillori
- Ianina
- Jaed
- Jaicey
- Jalynn
- Jedwin
- Jennybeth
- Jesse Jaymz
- Joelle
- Juleen
- Kamron
- Kamryn
- Kaycee
- Kellen
- Keslee
- Kindy
- Kortnie
- Kylianne
- Kyralyn
- Ladale
- Landa
- Lander
- Latrisha
- Lynneric
- MaCauley
- Mackinsy
- Margiore
- Marrianna
- McKinzy
- MeriLynn
- Mikaydee
- Mikenzey
- Mikkol
- Quinsie
- Rainie
- Randon
- Rindi
- Shalese
- Shali Lynn
- Shaton
- Shayahna
- Shelena
- Sierrah
- Silviya
- Taelor
- Taelynn
- Taylour
- Tayvia
- Twishekia
- Undrae
- Valaree
- Wittney
I’m not sure which one is my favorite, but honorable mention goes to “Mikaydee,” especially because the graduation ceremony took place across the street from the McKay-Dee Medical Center. I guess she should just be grateful she wasn’t born at Ogden Regional instead…
Must be specific to Utah? I grew up around a lot of Mormons (in Independence, MO) but I remember them having names along the lines of “Josiah,” “Carl,” “Katherine,” and “Adrian,” which don’t seem all that unusual. (OK, maybe “Josiah” is a little old-fashioned. But “Mikkol,” it isn’t.)
I think there needs to be a critical mass of Mormons.
When it comes to eccentric names the gold medal goes to the Puritans. How would you like to go through life with the name Fly-fornication?
https://historyofnothing.wordpress.com/2013/09/05/puritans-and-their-weird-names/
That’s a lot of dragon slayers you got there. That and pole dancers. “Shayahna” stood out because (I’m guessing) it’s pronounced Cheyenne-ah, which brings me to my little bad name story.
As a volunteer service one year, I coordinated the publishing of my daughters’ elementary school directory. Amongst all the Hannahs, Ariels, Tylers, Austins, Micheals, and Jacksons was this jem:
Shyann
There were at least a couple of Shyanns in the graduation booklet. They’re so common in these parts that they weren’t worth noting.
Hey, I’m glad you got a kick out of my name, and the fact you knew how to pronounce it is awesome. If you want to pile on the humor at this graduation I graduated from the nursing program. So there is a good chance I will work at McKay Dee.
🙂