Eegah! (1962) – You may think you love your children, but would you ever write and direct a movie with yourself as a supporting character, mostly so your son could have a chance to play the hero, and also to sing several rock’n’roll songs? No? Well, Arch Hall Sr. did that for Arch Hall Jr., so the bar has been raised, my friend. (Of course, Arch pere did cast himself as Arch fils‘ girlfriend’s dad, just so he could make some lovingly snide comments about “that noise” that was Arch fils‘ innocuous rock’n’roll balladeering…)
Also famous for being the first starring role for 7’2″ Richard Kiel, who went on to fame (such as it was) in the recurring role of “Jaws” in a couple of Roger Moore-eras James Bond films. Also also famous for co-starring Hall Sr.’s secretary Marilyn Manning as the fulcrum of the Hall Jr./Eegah love triangle. She’s very easy on the eyes, let it be said, and a nice dancer, and is probably acting as well as she can with the material she’s given.
UHF (1989) – It’s only through the bizarrest happenstance in an already bizarre universe that I never saw this at any time during the past 30 years — this despite the fact that several of the gags used are already in my go-to collection of dad jokes. I’m really the target audience.
I watched this with Michele, who didn’t experience nearly the level of viewing satisfaction as I did — so much so that I said, “I know you didn’t enjoy it, but I hope you at least enjoyed seeing how much *I* enjoyed it.”
Man in the Wilderness (1971) – Richard Harris (and I always tell my kids, “Look! It’s Dumbledore!”) is Zachary Bass, a fur trapper in the early 19th century. When he’s attacked by a bear and looks like a goner, his compatriots all leave him behind to get their load of furs back to civilization before (a) winter gets too bad and (b) the Indians get them. But Bass is so stubborn that he drags himself out of the open grave they left him in, finds little things to eat, clothes himself in the furs of the animals he catches, and sets off to catch up.
If this storyline sounds familiar, that’s because it was based on the same true story that inspired the 2015 movie The Revenant, starring Leonardo DeCaprio (who was, oddly enough, the same age in that movie as Harris was in this one — and yet who will NEVER seem as mature).
Ah, yes, Eegah! is the movie that came to mind once when I was considering potential parody combinations of various schlock movies based on nothing but their names: I had in mind to combine it with the 2007 propaganda flick (and box office bomb) In the Valley of Elah to make In the Valley of Eegah!
It’s pretty sad that Eegah! would be the draw of that combination.
“So Weaver, will you take the Red Snapper, or will you take what’s in the box that Hiro-san is bringing out right now? What’s it going to be?”
“I’ll take the box! The box!”
“You took the box! Let’s see what’s in the box!…*dramatic pause*…Nothing! Absolutely nothing! Stupid! You’re so STUPID!!!”
Yup.
Taking this as an opportunity to remind everyone that, “Spatula City! We sell spatulas…and that’s all!”